So, date 5 was dinner at his house. He asked me if I had anything in mind that I wanted, I told him to surprise me but I don't like beef stroganoff (LOL, long story there). He said that wouldn't be something he would make and asked if I like salmon and if there were any veggies I don't eat. I said salmon is great and gave him a list of about 5-6 veggies that I can't consume for taste reasons not allergy reasons.
I got to his house which is located in a little water community in Edgewater. The house is owned by a lady that owns a hair salon in DTA and it was VERY HOT in there. I was wearing a hoodie because I thought it would be cooler down by the water. I was very hot. The house has no AC, just units that they rarely use so all the windows/doors were open. There are also a gaggle of cats! There's stray cats all over the place and they come in and out as they please! Now, I'm not a HUGE fan of cats only because I'm allergic and yes, I do own a cat and she was a feral cat. But feral cats belong outside and pet cats belong inside. Feral outside cats have some disgusting habits that are not house appropriate. For example, they are not trained to go in a litter box, they have who knows what on them/in their fur, they are a bit more feisty due to the fact they have to fend for themselves against other wildlife, etc. They kept their distance so we got along ok.
Ryan cooked salmon topped with crab meat, red potatoes and asparagus on the grill. He ended up burning the asparagus so there were only about 2 stalks that were viable to consume. He also made a sauce to put on the salmon. He used a hollandaise packet but added some things to it. I would have preferred it all plain and he used way too much butter. My stomach was aching when I got home. The salmon and crab was good though. The potatoes were tasty as well.
After dinner, I did the dishes since he cooked. We then made some coffee and walked around the cute little community. Some BET head honcho lives in the community and has a gated house that looks amazing from the outside! If I had a selfie stick, I would have used it to see over the fences/gates. I am dying to know what the pool looks like. *Note to self-google earth that house*
We walked back to the house and I decided it was time to go. So that's where that date ended. We had plans to meet up last night for date 6.... so....
Last night we got suite tickets to the Nats game from a coworker of mine. He had his son, so he had to drop him off to the kid's mom at 1 and then he was to meet me at my house. When he got to me, he got a quick show-and-tell of the house, a Molly introduction, and then we left to get on the loveliness that is the DC Metro.
We got to the stadium and he was introduced to all my other coworkers/friends that were there. He also bought me a Sam Adams but then complained that it was 10 bucks a cup.... well, duh. So, me being me, can't have just one SA. I told him I would buy a second round if he wanted one. He walked with me, I thought he was going to insist on paying for the second round but no such luck. So I bought the second round.
Our plan was that we would walk by the waterfront after the game, but since the game went into 12 innings, it was too dark to do so and we hitched a ride back to my car at the metro with friends. That was wonderful even though the GPS aka "Esmarelda" took us the longest route possible.
We made it to the car and got back to the house about 9ish I guess. *Backtrack a bit- Ryan is not the best kisser. I'm not sure if I mentioned that in a previous post or not, but he's not. I thought perhaps the technique would get better once "nerves" would calm down. Nope, kissing him isn't that fun.** Back on track- so since he was staying over, things got going in the physical direction but that sucks too! He thinks that the faster you move, the better it is. I don't have time or patience to be training a 42 year old man in the dynamics of how to please a female. Hell, he was married for 13 years... how? why? what? It was so bad that after about 5-10 minutes (I wasn't timing it but it wasn't long), I had to tell him that I "wasn't feeling it". Yes, I used those exact words and added that I wish I did, but I don't. He asked me what I meant, was I not feeling "the moment" or him completely. I told him the moment. He said that's fine and he would be perfectly happy just holding me all night. I don't want to be held or even touched when I'm awake never mind when I'm trying to sleep the 5 minutes a night I do sleep! I told him I also didn't want him to put his dating life on hold just for me because I'm not sure what I want (I know exactly what I want, I'm just not sure it's him). He said that he's willing to wait and see where we go and he's not going anywhere. He's sure that we are headed in a good direction. I explained to him that I am a bit commitment phobic and that signing a cell phone contract makes me hyperventilate and I'm not sure about the fact that he has a kid. That puts a different spin on things plus his work schedule is different too so I would never have a full day or weekend with him just to myself. He has his kid on his days off, so until I meet his kid-it will never be full day dates with him. And, once I do meet the kid it won't be just him and I... so.... there lies the issue.
His kid also is into video games galore. That's all he does when he visits Ryan...plays mine craft. He doesn't like roller coasters/rides so amusement parks are out, he's never been camping but Ryan says he would like to take him at some point but I'm not convinced he'd be into it. We talked a bit about if we were to get into a full blown relationship then I know I wouldn't be his mom because he has a mom but I would be some sort of parental figure since we'd be together and whatnot. Ryan's response was "sort of". That bugged me. I mean I know I wouldn't jump into Stepmom mode lickedy split but eventually, he would have to see me as an authoritative figure in his life. I get the feeling that wouldn't fly too well with Ryan. But then again, I wouldn't allow Ryan to discipline Molly-however, it's a little different. Ryan also mentioned that he doesn't plan on moving in with someone anytime in the near future...well I don't want him moving in with me ever. I can't sleep with someone else in my bed, I like my space and my perfect match would have a house of his own where we could live separately but spend the night over whichever one's house whenever we felt necessary. I don't sleep well and I sleep even less when I have to share a bed with someone.
With all the above said, I don't get the warm fuzzies and the over the moon feeling when I'm around him. I do enjoy his company and I enjoy spending time with him but I think it's because I see him as a friend and I like doing things with company. I believe he has entered the friend zone. We are still planning on going to Stevie Wonder next weekend but I might have to break the FZ news to him before then so it's not weird and he doesn't try to kiss me or grope me.
I'm sure my friends that are reading this will have a lot of opinions about "giving it some time" or "enjoy the moment" or "blah blah blah" but If it's not who I want and I'm not over the moon about him, I don't want to waste his or my time being in a situation that I'm not 100% comfortable with. Someone out there has to be my match, where I can't wait to see him (even after 3 dates) and it pains me to be away from him. With Ryan, I like to spend a couple hours with him and then I want my space. I guess we will see.....
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